Saturday, September 24, 2011

Donuts Dispair and Disapointment

As you can probably tell by the title of this post it hasn't been the best week on record, and since this is partially my blog I'm going to tell you all about and god dammit your going to listen.  Last weekend Lindsey and I went to Alameda to visit Trav and H.P. and we checked out a donut place up their.  Before we went to eat treats we figured it would be cool to have Trav, my brother, be a guest blogger.  Now, I would like to make an official statement, on the record.  "My brother is a Stinky McStinky pants.  He's so stinky that dogs don't even like to smell him.  He's so stinky that people who pump out you septic tank say "god damn, that's stinky."  He's so stinky that given donut's, coffee and pictures, he can't even write a simple donut blog about how donuts and coffee are awesome as beans."  So, brother, I hope this level of public humiliation will tempt you to stop playing call of duty and blog.  And by the way, that fresh unicorn he's rockin', Lindsey and H.P. drew that on him cause he passed out at like 9:30 after drinking tequila, what a smelly smelly kid.  Oh, and I was in a car accident, a very minor one, but that's not nearly as interesting as Trav's stink.  Enough blubbering about smelly kids, TO THE DONUTS. 
     OK.  Today, 9/24/2011 at about 12: 40, your favorite crime duo advanced upon Dragon Donut 8709 Corbin Ave, Northridge for a second assault on the castle.  I'm sure you remember our last attempt to get donuts from the 24 hour donut place, failure.  But today we were better prepared.  Guns blazing, we kicked in the door and were greeted by a very nice asian gentlemen sporting a blue-tooth earpiece.  Interupting his phone call with the threat of violence, we demanded his service and were soon out the door in posetion of a crumby donut and a apple fritter.  Wait, apple fritter???  Yea, that's right.  And all it cost me was $2.00.
     First impressions:
     1.  another creepy stripmall  7-11, liqueur store, taco place
     2.  your basic array of donuts, in different shapes and sizes of course
     Donut number one, my donut, the crumby donut.  I'm still not sure exactly what the crumb is on a crumb donut, but it's amazing.  This particular crumb donut was glazed and then crumbed so there was tone of crumby topping to enjoy.  And enjoy it I did.  I think I ate it in 3 bites, just an all around beautiful experience, like shooting a gun, zen.
     Donut number two, not really a donut at all, the apple fritter.  I gues it should have bee donut number one and then fritter number one, but I'm very stubborn so I'm not going to change it.  I don't know what possessed Lindsey to get an apple fritter, maybe she's just feeling fruity (snicker snicker)  or something.  HEY, STOP HATING.  It was pretty good.  It was very sweet, and appley, and the dough had a nice little chewiness to it that was just delightful.  Lindsey quote time, "it wasn't very appley, wait, it was a good amount of appley-ness, but it was sweet, and heavy, so sweet and heavy that I could only eat half."  But in reality, folks, she microwaved half and made me eat like two thirds of it.  But it was still tasty.
     So after family tomfoolery, highway hi-jinx, and donut deception, it has been an interesting week.  But on the plus side I am in possession of one job.  yea for me.  So like always
     Tune in next time for another exciting adventure of
     starring Nate (whacky pants) Chester, smelly Trav and wonton master Lindsey
                                                                                                        post brought to you by Nate

Sunday, September 11, 2011

staying at the donut inn

                Today we woke up bright and early around 11am, and with little milk and almost no cereal in the apartment we had no other choice, but to get donuts for breakfast. By the time we put on our going-out-in-public clothes, watched a few episodes of X-Men (that's the 1990's cartoon, not the newer one where all the X-Men are high school brats) it was about 12:15pm, and definitely time for donuts.
                 A few days ago while on my way to a job interview I happened to pass a place named Dragon Donuts. Needless to say I wanted to go in and grab a few donuts right then and there, but I felt like I was betraying Nate. After all, if I did go in and get a few donuts odds were that none would make it back to the apartment for him to enjoy. I have little self control, and even less when sweet treats are involved. So today we decided to go to Dragon Donuts together. The store boasts that it is open 24 hours. Unfortunately for us, it's not. It's closed form noon to 6:30pm every Sunday. And we just missed them.
              Upset and hungry, we went in search of a new donut destination, and came across the Donut Inn at 20050 Vanowen Street. Like every other donut shop we've been to this one was in a strip mall. No surprise. But it wasn't next to a liquor store, instead it was across the street from a strip club called the Candy Cat Too, which makes sense because stripping is exhausting and what better way to refuel than with donuts and coffee?
              After momentarily pausing to take in the scenery we went into the Donut Inn, and were greeted by a wide selection of donuts and pastries, and a smiling cashier who eagerly grabbed the donuts we pointed to, and a small coffee for Nate all for a cool $2.70. The coffee itself was unimpressive and rather average, the likes of what might be found at your typical gas station. But they did have real creamer, and coffee lids that were made by someone other than Satan so they get extra points for that.
             Then there were the donuts. Again I foolishly selected a small donut. "But, Lindsey", you might ask, "does size really matter?" Yes. Yes it does. And anyone who would say otherwise is a liar or doesn't have enough experience to know any better. The bigger donuts tend to be more light and fluffy and the smaller ones tend to be denser, and these two were no exceptions. The chocolate frosted donut in addition to being light and fluffy was slightly crispy on the outside. It also had "not too much frosting" according to Nate, which for me means that it wasn't chocolatey enough, but he seemed to like it. The miniscule vanilla with coconut one on the other hand, had just enough vanilla and coconut flavor for me, but Nate felt the vanilla overpowered the coconut. I suppose the only way to settle our disputes is to go back to the Donut Inn in the future, or to drag someone else along as a tie breaker.
Until next time, keep eating donuts!
- Lindsey

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

luvin' my donuts right around the corner

Hello again faithful followers of the one true almighty, THE DONUT LORD; keeper of pastry, giver of frosting, and the everlasting creator or sprinkles.  Once again we have traveled to lands previously undiscovered to find another sacred temple of the donut.  This time, we went around the corner to Yum-Yum Donuts at 20129 Vanowen St.  Not surprisingly, this donut shop is also located in a strip mall right next to a liquor store, and so on a balmy Monday afternoon we decided to get some treats on way to target, again, and emerged with 1 coffee and 2 donuts, a chocolate frosted custard donut and a regular chocolate frosted donut with coconut, for a total of $2.70.
     Lindsey's custard (or boston creme??) was quite delicious, according to her, with just a couple disappointing mentions: uneven custard distribution and an odd presence of maple flavor, but if you ask me, maple flavor shouldn't count against anything.  However, even taking into account the lopsided filling she still happily described her donut as "big, moist, soft and sweet.  An overall YUMMMMMM!"  My choice, and I believe the correct one, was the chocolate frosted with coconut.  Now, as far as I'm concerned, one can never go wrong with coconut and once again I prove myself right, again.  Simply amazing, just like making out with Jesus, literally.  That might have been taking it a little too far, but being the stubborn man that I am, I refuse to retract my statement.  Next, to the coffee.  I believe that this is one of the better cups that I've had in my donut chasing experience thus far.  Now you might be saying, "NATE, there was only non dairy creamer, and the official lids of Beelzebub, how can you condone coffee under these circumstances."  Well, your probably right, BUT I DON'T CARE, it was good anyway.
     Wow, have you noticed that these posts of mine are getting longer and longer, cause I think they have been... but if you have a problem with that you can feel free to send any and all complaints to where I can read them and laugh, and then not send you a birthday card.  So thanks for watching and be sure to tune in next time for ADVENTURES IN COFFEE AND DONUTS WITH NATE AND LINDSEY. 
                                                                                                          -Nate Chester